Anxiety Be Gone

I usually sit here alone for 20 minutes before work and have this huge wave of....well I was going to say anxiety but I am not sure that is it. My stomach feels all weird, I start to miss Farron (even though he's only been gone an hour), miss my parents, and all my friends, I usually tear up (which I am doing now), and just wish I could stay home all day.

It's the worst feeling in the world and I can not shake it. Yesterday was the worst I cried myself to sleep and cried all morning before and after Farron left. I threw up twice and called my parents bauling!!! I am such a huge baby. And I just wish I didn't feel this way.

I truely madly deeply want to stay home, be a stay at home wife. I have started to like doing the wifey duties like coooking supers, packing lunches, seeing FArron off to work in the morning, ironing, washing clothes, cleaning, vaccuming, etc... I just really wish a miracle would happen so that I wouldn't have to work outside the home.

I always thought I wanted to be a career woman. Turns out I don't. But I guess it's too late now, with all my debt. Please just pray that I will be okay....